Tip #1

Prepare ahead of time for your appointments

I keep a special folder (bright colour so I won't lose it so easily) just for my psychiatrist and therapy appointments. I put anything I want to show them such as information about medicines I want to know about, programs I want to get into, or poems & journalling I wrote. I also put my list of questions I always have built up since my last appointment. Of course I bring my "Healing Calendar" where I chart my daily sleep, mood and medicine intake. By having this folder I usually get to cover everything I want to ask while I am with my doctor instead of walking out and 2 minutes after the appointment saying," Oh no, I wanted to ask.....!!!" Then have to wait another month or two before I can ask him.

[Facing Us.Org]

Publication

All of the information here is based on the findings of the National Inquiry into Self-harm among Young People. The Inquiry was carried out by two charities, The Mental Health Foundation and The Camelot Foundation. The Inquiry panel heard evidence from many hundreds of people including young people who self-harm, or have self-harmed in the past, and those who work with or care about them.

This 32 page booklet is based on what they said. You will see the words of young people who have self-harmed throughout this booklet, in the form of quotes.

For more information about the Inquiry and its findings, visit Young People & Self Harm, Nationa Inquiry and the Appendix at the back of this booklet.

Who Is Likely To Engage In Self-injurious Behavior?

Both males and females engage in self-injurious behavior. Self-harm often begins in early adolescence, peaks between the ages of 18 and 24, and decreases as the person enters the 30s and 40s. There are, however, cases of self-harm occurring in much younger children and continuing into middle age.

Adolescents are particularly vulnerable as they face many difficult and inherently stressful developmental challenges. The body undergoes profound change during adolescence. It is a time of physiological and psychological turbulence and uncertainty. Faced with abrupt and embarrassing changes, teens can feel a loss of control of their bodies. For many adolescents, experiencing a sense of alienation from their own bodies becomes a powerful catalyst for and predictor of self-injurious behavior. In addition, teenagers struggle with the need for peer acceptance, shifting peer allegiances, a greater desire for autonomy and control and complicated decisions and conflicts that demand resolution.

Within this overwhelming context, adolescents are at even greater risk when their parents are physically or emotionally unavailable to them. In some families, there may be unhealthy communication, parental alcoholism, untreated mental illness, financial stress, domestic violence and parental neglect or pro-longed absences. Teens are unable to negotiate these challenges, process their feelings and articulate their needs without the guidance, support and feedback of a nurturing caretaker. They simply do not have the required coping skills to manage on their own, and they discover that self-injurious behavior is one way to deal with life.

Teenagers who have undiagnosed and untreated depression and anxiety are more likely to engage in self-harming behaviors as a way to self-soothe and self-medicate. Teens who struggle with low self-esteem and feelings of worthlessness are equally at risk. Adolescents with dissociative disorders, posttraumatic stress disorder, substance abuse problems and eating disorders are at increased risk to cut or burn. One of the greatest risk factors is a history of physical, emotional or sexual abuse. Trauma survivors learn to internalize their rage and dissociate or "check out" to escape pain. In addition, they have had their perpetrators model a blatant disregard for the safety and well being of their bodies. This combination of experiences almost inevitably sets the stage for some form of self-destructive behavior.

Taken from *PRP Online

*Performance Resource Press

Fridays Readers Story

Ben said...
To be 100% honest, my reason for beginning to burn (which progressed to cutting) wasn't what I've read about on most "help" sites. The reason I started was because I wanted to actually feel pain for the first time and be able to control it. It doesn't bring out a sense of enjoyment like the average family man would have while spending time with his family, but it makes me feel good as I do it and after I do it.

I don't want to sound like someone who is overly compulsive about hurting themselves because that is not the case. I started about a month ago and I think about doing it everyday with two knives and a set of matches sitting on my desk. I'm not sure if I want to stop because I'm not sure if it is a huge problem or not, but I do feel differently about my self-esteem since I started.

The more I burn the more I feel that I am isolating myself. I planned on trying to start a relationship with someone that I know but as i started my self-image shot so far into the toilet that I basically pushed her away and then felt lonely and at a total loss of confidence that she isn't talking to me much anymore. Again, to be completely honest, I'm not even sure why I'm leaving a comment on this site that I found within the last 5 minutes.

Well to get to the point, I'm not sure if I should stop or not because it does 2 things for me: 1. it makes me feel fearless (to a lesser extent) and 2. it is (i think) making me isolate myself from everyone around me. Diagnosed as clinically depressed over a year ago, I have even failed to show, or even talk to my shrink about these things. I'm unsure if what I'm feeling is something that everyone goes through and although my issues don't seem as hard to deal with as some others who has had the courage to share but I do feel it is worth either seeking help for or being told that my reason for burning/cutting is sufficient and that this phase will end soon enough.

There is more to my story if you are interested because I would love to talk to someone who is interested in an unconcerned (parent-like) way.

My email is bensjamin_@hotmail.com
November 30, 2007

Image:Alone by ~bluedicius

See Me ...

See me, is a media campaign in Scotland to stop the stigma associated with mental health. This clip was one that was broadcast in that country. This coincides with the UK, 'Just Like Me' campaign.

Live Life

I don't want to get to the end of my life and find that I have just lived the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well.

Diane Ackerman

Wordless Wednesday - Anger

Image: reflecting anger by ~chrisbonney

Website

Kate’s Blog

on Mental Health, Parenting & Wellness Education

Kate McLaughlin speaks and writes about all things mental health.
Her personal experience and positive attitude combine with current research, facts, and proven strategies to encourage those affected by mental illness, inform the unaware, and eradicate the stigma that surrounds diseases of the brain.

Kate is a member of the Child and Adolescent Bipolar Foundation, Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance, the Juvenile Bipolar Research Foundation, the National Alliance on Mental Illness, and Mental Health America.

Kate has a good article on 10 Myths concerning teen depression that I will feature at a later date

Alternatives

Each Tuesday we've been focusing on alternatives.. I've written on alternatives to anger, and the use of ice. This week, a few suggestions on alternatives to the feeling of dissociation.

Harming yourself is not the only way to cope with your feelings. Here are some of the ideas other young people have come up with to find different ways of coping. Some may work for you! A lot depends on thinking about why you are self harming. People often harm themselves because they can find no other way to relieve a feeling of being overwhelmed by intense emotions.

Dissociation

Dissociation : Feeling so overwhelmed by everything going on around, you want to escape or distract yourself by making a louder metaphorical noise.

• Try squeezing ice or putting a hand in a mixture of water, salt and ice for a few seconds.
• Try putting a rubber band around a wrist then pinging it when you need to. I always have a band on my wrist...its become habit now, like biting my nails...lol.
• Try taking a cold/hot shower.
• Try biting into something like a lemon or a hot pepper. This Ive used, and wasabi.
• Try doing something creative like making a collage, write poetry, bake or paint.
• Try to focus on breathing. I count as I breathe, 1001, 2001, 3001, 4001 etc, in through nose, out through mouth.
• Try to play taxing games like tetris, minesweeper or snake.
• Try choosing an object in the room and describing it as you would to a blind person - its size, weight, colour etc. I sort of do this, but I say, 'Im in the lounge, sitting on a blue chair, my feet are on carpet, I can see a window etc'
• Try scribbling on paper. I do this free form, with no thought, just purging...
• Try being around people, perhaps playing games with a younger sibling, hugging someone or helping someone else.
• Try opening the dictionary in random places and learning new words, also try thinking in another language as you may have to simplify your thoughts. I wouldnt be able to focus enough for this one.
• Try creating a mental 'safe place'. I'm not good at this one but sometimes I combine it with my breathing exercises

Whatever my trigger, I remember the feeling of being overwhelmed, and chanting in my head 'This is not fucking real' over and over, the trick was for me to learn the feeling, sounds easy eh! but to identify it and in the early days just to focus on the word 'Stay'

[taken from Icet.org]