Birmingham

Support For People at Risk of Self Harm

Last Friday I attended an open day at the Zinnia Centre in Sparkhill, Birmingham where I met staff, volunteers and members of a support and action group for people who are at risk of self harm. The group is called SASH and meets every first tuesday of the month between 5.30 and 7.30pm.

The programme of forthcoming events includes a talk on Distraction techniques on 2nd June, 'Mind,body and soul' - alternative therapies to reduce self harm on 7th July and Good turn week - volunteering your way to happiness on 1st September.

To find out more about the SASH Forum please contact the Zinnia Centre on 0121 301 5700. You will need to check out whether you are eligible to attend the group beforehand (are you living in the right area...there may be a group in your own area).

The group have various resources around self-harm including an information pack full of guidance, information, contact details of support groups and coping systems and strategies.

Self harm is defined as "An intentional self poisening or self injury (such as cutting), irrespectove of the apparent purpose of the act".

The Information Pack goes on to say:

"Self harm is therefore a way of releasing and dealing with emotions, and includes the idea of punishing the bbody. This may be caused by many factors such as:

• past / present trauma
• low esteem - lack of confidence
• feelings of isolation - (agoraphobia)
• fear of being different or misunderstood
• lack of support, including lack of communication

For anyone who knows someone, a relative, friend or service user at risk of slef harming, the pack offers the following Methods for Help:

• Be open about self harm
• Offer advice and understanding
• Support, care and friendhsip
• Offer sources of help
• Show the person is not alone
• Offer the opportunity to share experiences - either in specialist group or 1 to 1
• Give direct answers
• Offer distraction techniques and work through these
• Building on trust (counsellor or psychiatrist)

For information from Birmingham and Mental Health Trust contact 0121 678 2000

As well as local groups such as the one based at the Zinnia Centre, SASH run a national support line on self harm matters on:

07805073590 or 078050735573

Other useful numbers include:

Childline

0800 1111

Samaritans

0845 90 90 90

Focusline (all issues regrading mental health)

0800 027 2127

Dosti Men's Group (Birmingham self harm support group)

0121 685 7120

There are also websites worth visiting for further information:

http://www.selfharmuk.org/

http://www.siari.co.uk/

http://www.youngminds.org.uk/

Source: Spaghetti Gazetti

Why does self-injury make some people feel better?

There are a few possibilities, and the answer is probably a mixture of them. Biological predisposition, reduction of tension, and lack of experience in dealing with strong emotions are all factors.

It reduces physiological and psychological tension rapidly.
Studies have suggested that when people who self-injure get emotionally overwhelmed, an act of self-harm brings their levels of psychological and physiological tension and arousal back to a bearable baseline level almost immediately. In other words, they feel a strong uncomfortable emotion, don't know how to handle it (indeed, often do not have a name for it), and know that hurting themselves will reduce the emotional discomfort extremely quickly. They may still feel bad (or not), but they don't have that panicky jittery trapped feeling; it's a calm bad feeling.

This explains why self-injury can be so addictive: It works. When you have a quick, easy way to make the bad stuff go away for a while, why would you want to go through the hard work of finding other ways to cope? Eventually, though, the negative consequences add up, and people do seek help.

Some people never get a chance to learn how to cope effectively
We aren't born knowing how to express and cope with our emotions -- we learn from our parents, our siblings, our friends, schoolteachers, -- everyone in our lives. One factor common to most people who self-injure, whether they were abused or not, is invalidation. They were taught at an early age that their interpretations of and feelings about the things around them were bad and wrong. They learned that certain feelings weren't allowed. In abusive homes, they may have been severely punished for expressing certain thoughts and feelings. At the same time, they had no good role models for coping. You can't learn to cope effectively with distress unless you grow up around people who are coping effectively with distress. How could you learn to cook if you'd never seen anyone work in a kitchen?

Although a history of abuse is common among self-injurers, not everyone who self-injures was abused. Sometimes, invalidation and lack of role models for coping are enough, especially if the person's brain chemistry has already primed them for choosing this sort of coping.

Problems with neurotransmitters may play a role
Just as it's suspected that the way the brain uses serotonin may play a role in depression, so scientists think that problems in the serotonin system may predispose some people to self-injury by making them tend to be more aggressive and impulsive than most people. This tendency toward impulsive aggression, combined with a belief that their feelings are bad or wrong, can lead to the aggression being turned on the self. Of course, once this happens, the person harming himself learns that self-injury reduces his level of distress, and the cycle begins. Some researchers theorize that a desire to release endorphins, the body's natural painkillers, is involved.

Why Does Self-injury Make Some People Feel Better?

• It reduces physiological and psychological tension rapidly.
  Studies have suggested that when people who self-injure get emotionally overwhelmed, an act of self-harm brings their levels of psychological and physiological tension and arousal back to a bearable baseline level almost immediately. In other words, they feel a strong uncomfortable emotion, don't know how to handle it (indeed, often do not have a name for it), and know that hurting themselves will reduce the emotional discomfort extremely quickly. They may still feel bad (or not), but they don't have that panicky jittery trapped feeling; it's a calm bad feeling.

• Some people never get a chance to learn how to cope effectively.
  One factor common to most people who self-injure, whether they were abused or not, is invalidation. They were taught at any early age that their interpretations of and feelings about the things around them were bad and wrong. They learned that certain feelings weren't allowed. In abusive homes, they may have been severely punished for expressing certain thoughts and feelings. At the same time, they had no good role models for coping. You can't learn to cope effectively with distress unless you grow up around people who are coping effectively with distress. Although a history of abuse is common about self-injurers, not everyone who self-injures was abused. Sometimes invalidation and lack of role models for coping are enough, especially if the person's brain chemistry has already primed them for choosing this sort of coping.

• Problems with neurotransmitters may play a role.
  Just as it's suspected that the way the brain uses serotonin may play a role in depression, so scientists think that problems in the serotonin system may predispose some people to self-injury by making them tend to be more aggressive and impulsive than most people. This tendency toward impulsive aggression, combined with a belief that their feelings are bad or wrong, can lead to the aggression being turned on the self. Of course, once this happens, the person harming himself learns that self-injury reduces his level of distress, and the cycle begins. Some researchers theorize that a desire to release endorphins, the body's natural painkillers, is involved.

• taken from: Focus Adolescent Services
  

About Self Injury

Self harm is when someone deliberately hurts or injures themselves. Self injury can take a number of forms including:

• cutting or burning - the most common forms of self-harm

• taking overdoses of tablets or medicines
• punching themselves
• throwing their bodies against something
• pulling out their hair or eyelashes
• scratching, picking or tearing at their skin causing sores and scarring
• inhaling or sniffing harmful substances
• swallowing things that are not edible
• inserting objects into their bodies

Why Do People Self Injure?

Psychological motivations: What self-injurers say SI does for them.

Many papers on self-harm (Miller, 1994; Favazza 1986, 1996; Connors, 1996a, 2000; Solomon & Farrand, 1996; Ousch et al., 1999; Suyemoto, 1998; and others), have uncovered possible motivations for self-injurious behaviours:

• Escape from emptiness, depression, and feelings of unreality.
• Easing tension.
• Providing relief: when intense feelings build, self-injurers are overwhelmed and unable to cope. By causing pain, they reduce the level of emotional and physiological arousal to a bearable one.
• Relieving anger: many self-injurers have enormous amounts of rage within. Afraid to express it outwardly, they injure themselves as a way of venting these feelings.
• Escaping numbness: many of those who self-injure say they do it in order to feel something, to know that they're still alive.
• Grounding in reality, as a way of dealing with feelings of depersonalisation and dissociation
• Maintaining a sense of security or feeling of uniqueness
• Obtaining a feeling of euphoria
• Preventing suicide
• Expressing emotional pain they feel they cannot bear
• Obtaining or maintaining influence over the behaviours of others
• Communicating to others the extent of their inner turmoil
• Communicating a need for support
• Expressing or repressing sexuality
• Expressing or coping with feelings of alienation
• Validating their emotional pain -- the wounds can serve as evidence that those feelings are real
• Continuing abusive patterns: self-injurers tend to have been abused as children.
• Punishing oneself for being "bad"
• Obtaining biochemical relief: there is some thought that adults who were repeatedly traumatized as children have a hard time returning to a "normal" baseline level of arousal and are, in some sense, addicted to crisis behaviour. Self-harm can perpetuate this kind of crisis state
• Diverting attention (inner or outer) from issues that are too painful to examine
• Exerting a sense of control over one's body
• Preventing something worse from happening

The assumption is that the alternative to self injury is acting normal but on the contrary…the alternative to self injury is total loss of control and possibly suicide.

Hence the need to carefully manage a young person’s self harm is crucial to enable them to remain safe. Ensuring that they are empowered to minimise the harm that they do to themselves and maximise their potential to gain positive control over their lives.

[taken from Newcombe House UK]

(Some) True Confessions of a Self Harmer

Overcoming the urge to self-inflict has been one of the hardest things I have had to deal with through this tumultuous time suffering from depression.As I said above, IT IS AN ADDICTION. Pure and simple!

And anyone who has tried giving up smoking or gambling or Lindt or badgers will know that overcoming addiction is fucking hard! Not only because of the pure level of addiction, but also because it means having to face up to whatever problem is feeding that addiction in the first place. Whatever buried pain is making us smoke, drink or gamble needs to be faced up to. In essence, we need to become whip-wielding dominatrixies in order to tame and eventually command our problems.

To overcome self-harm we, like with every form of mental illness, we need to start talking about it in order to understand it, in order to help people overcome and control their addiction.

So how can you help? If you know someone who self-harms here are a few pointers:
- Whatever they’re doing DON”T take it personally. It isn’t about YOU!

- Be available and LISTEN to them if they need to talk.

- ACKNOWLEDGE their pain, it won’t make it go away, but it will make it more bearable.

- DON’T avoid the subject or pretend it’s not there.

- ASK THEM “I know you hurt yourself and I would like to understand it a little more, could you maybe explain why you do it? I’d be grateful if you could.”

- DON’T confiscate their “tools” (because I guarantee you this will lose their trust and they will just get more creative anyway)

- BELIEVE in them and BE HOPEFUL

- DON’T push them

- TAKE the initiative and distract them; take them to the cinema, rent a DVD, bake some chocolate brownies, go to a trivia night, go for a walk, have a playful pillow or water pistol fight, hell, if they’re your bf or gf, do a seductive strip tease and get them thinking about that cute butt of yours.

- DO spontaneous acts of kindness

- Be available, and willing, to LISTEN if they need to talk.

- EDUCATE yourself

– slip on your Willow hat and hop on the net for some research.

- SUPPORT them physically; call them up and tell them you’re worried about them and invite them over for a game of scrabble or a blueberry muffin.

- SUPPORT them emotionally; go to the Doctor/Psychologist with them.And please, please…whatever you do…

- DO NOT TRY TO MAKE/ORDER THEM TO STOP!!!!!!!!!

If you make them feel guilty, or punish them in any way, this will just add fuel to their addiction.
And please, please, please, please…whatever you do…remember to…

- Take TIME OUT and recuperate, caring/loving someone who suffers from any form of mental illness is exhausting and you need to look after yourself.

Although it’s confronting, brutal and painful to think that people you care about are inflicting this pain on themselves remember that to them it is merely an addiction. A symptom of a larger, possibly unknown illness or condition, and they just need some help and support in order to get them through it.

As we’ve all experienced from time to time: the over-riding feeling of loneliness and emptiness is a powerful influence. It’s time to stop judging people who self harm, and start understanding what they are feeling; it’s the only way to understand their pain.

by Addy


[Eliminate The Stigma]

Why We Self Injure

Not everyone self-injures for the same reason. Many of us even have more than one reason for doing it. Here are listed some of the more common reasons. There are others that may not be listed here, of course.

To deal with unbearable emotions.
Because we were never taught (or allowed) to express feelings in a healthier way.
To punish ourselves for not being good enough, smart enough, fast enough.
To help prevent ourselves from feeling emotional pain.
For the scars: To "mark" oursleves with our failures and successes.
To get "high".
To feel something.
Because we are addicted and feel we have to.

To deal with unbearable emotions.
I think that this is the most common reason why we self-injure. We seem to be more sensitive than the average person, and so emotions that would cause them to "boil over" or "shut down" become absolutly unbearable when placed within ourselves. Not having been born with pressure release valves atop our heads, our self-injury is the fastest and easiest method for us to use to lessen these extreme emotions.

Because we were never taught (or allowed) to express feelings in a healthier way.
Maybe we grew up in abusive homes. Maybe our parents were "solid rocks" in the face of stress. Maybe they painted everything a happy shade and ignored the darker colours of the spectrum. In some way those of us who fit in this group were short-changed emotionally. No one taught us healthy release for all our emotions. Maybe we didn't have the laughter, maybe there were never any tears, maybe we never learned just what to do with anger. One day we self-injured (either accidentally or on purpose) and it lessened the pressure of those emotions which we were bottled up inside of us. Hence the cycle began.

To punish ourselves for not being good enough, smart enough, fast enough.
I have seen this in many professionals and overacheivers, and to a lesser extent in other self-injurers as well. Most of us in this group grew up in strict homes, many of us had overbearing perfectionists for parents. Some of us were abused or severly punished for no reasons at all, or for reasons we never really understood. We don't feel adequate. We don't feel that we can be "good enough". Most everything we do is wrong, and we feel we must be punished for it. In short, we feel we must "pay the price" for our inadequecies.

To help prevent ourselves from feeling emotional pain.
Often we self-injure to mute our emotional pains. By focusing on the physical actions of self-injuring, and then dealing with the physical pain of the injury, we can push aside the emotional hurt for awhile, or even forget it entirely. Almost all self-injurers occassionally fall into this category, I think.

For the scars: To "mark" oursleves with our failures and successes.
Some people don't consider this self-injury, but I do. Mainly because once the addiction begins to take us over we will do anything to repeat it, any excuse that seems reasonable to our subconscious. and self-injury of this sort is just as addictive as any other type. I know ladies who get a piercing everytime a bioyfriend leaves them, men who get a tattoo for every pay raise and new car. I think it's self-injury of a different sort. These people don't realise what they're doing, because their self-injury is more "socially acceptable". Maybe the guy with 24 facial piecings gets weird looks, but no one draws him aside and suggest hospital stays and medications, no one believes that he's going to kill himself or die trying. I have also met self-injurers who cut their forearms and legs to mark "successes" or "failures". It's even been rumoured that Christian Slater (popular U.S. actor) scars himself with cutting to mark the "important stages" of his life. In rare cases I suppose you could even find someone who burns or brands to mark themselves.

To get "high".
Self-injury, blood loss, and pain all cause chemical reactions in your brain. This chemical reaction causes a sort "high" in many people. Some self-injurers become addicted to this giddy, invincible feeling, and continue self-injuring to get this feeling.

To feel something.
Sometimes the sheer "nothingness" becomes too much too handle. Those of us who fit in this group have a lack of emotion. We don't feel much of anything, and what we do feel is very muted. This often results from a mood disorder, psychiatric medications, or traumatisation. Those in this group self-injure to feel something, to them anything, even pain, is better than feeling nothing at all.

Because we are addicted and feel we have to.
As mentioned, self-injury does cause chemical reactions in the brain (pretty much anything that deals with emotions does), and it's easy to become addicted to the "highs". However, it is also easy to become addicted to the "lows" of self-injury. We self-injure so often and for such deep reasons that it becomes like a cancer. We begin scratching as children, are biting as teens, and cutting by adulthood. The self-injury is the only way we know how to "cope" and so we begin to use it more and more often to help us get through life.

Written by Kharres.

2.9 Explanations of Self-harming Behaviour

The models presented here provide a theoretical overview of the possible reasons that individuals engage in self-harming behaviours (Suyemoto, 1998). The following table is adapted from Suyemoto and MacDonald’s (1995) Model Summaries and Suyemoto’s (1998) Functional Models of Self-Mutilation.

Current Models Used To Explain Self-Harming Behaviour
Environmental Model Grounded in behavioural & systemic theory, particularly Bandura’s (1977) social learning theory, this model concentrates on the interaction between an individual who self-harms & their environment.
Environmental	Self-harming behaviour is learnt through modelling or vicarious reinforcement. Adolescents typically learn that injury & care are associated via their parents’ models, & attempt to use self-harm as a mechanism for self-caring. Self-harming is subsequently maintained by external reinforcement (i.e. attention, social status) or self-reinforced (i.e. relief from emotional tension, ending dissociation).
Drive Models Based on psychoanalytic theory, these two models conceptualise self-harm as repression or an expression of life, death & sexual drives.
Antisuicide	Self-harm is seen as conceptually distinct from suicide in intent, lethality & desired outcome. Destructive impulses are directed into self-harming behaviours to avoid the total destruction of the self. As such, self-harm is conceptualised as an active coping mechanism, not a suicide attempt.
Sexual	Self-harm is a form of punishment for or an attempt to avoid sexual feelings or acts; an attempt to control sexuality or sexual maturation; or a means of attaining sexual gratification. Support for this model is derived from the high correlation between sexual abuse & self-harm, the absence of self-harm before puberty, & the greater incidence of sexual dysfunction exhibited by self-harmers.
Affect Regulation Models Predominantly situated within ego and self-psychology, although also associated with object relations theory, the following two models view self-harm as a means of regulating affect.
Affect Regulation	Self-harm is a means of communicating to the self or others, the intolerable emotional pain experienced by the individual. It is also a mechanism for maintaining control over these intense emotions & feelings.
Dissociation	Self-harm is utilised to terminate or induce dissociation to create or maintain a sense of self when presented with intolerable emotional pain.
Interpersonal Model Fundamentally grounded in object relations but also conceptualised in self-psychology, this model focuses on the need to emphasise the boundaries of the self.
Boundaries	Self-harm is used an attempt to overcome the intense feelings & emotions that threaten to engulf the individual. The skin - the most obvious physical boundary between the self & others – is attacked to reiterate a sense of self & the blood reassures the self-harmer that they are alive.

* Taken from the 2004 Project Report
Adolescent Self-Harm: An Exploration of the Nature and Prevalence in Banyule/Nillumbik
[the report is a word document but can be veiwed in html .... abz

Self harm prejudice - Guest Post

Article by Tony White

Sunday, 28 September 2008

Self harm prejudice

There was an article in today’s Sunday Times newspaper by Dr Cindy Pan on self harming. It is just a short piece and quite a good statement of what the literature says in general and it does in particular highlight a prejudice that is commonly, if not very regularly found in the writings on self harm.

There are a number of reasons why people self harm and I have listed four below

1. Cutting self to release stress and tension
2. Cutting self to get a sense of feeling real
3. Cutting self to manipulate others
4. Cutting self to get attention

Some self harm for these reasons

For some reason numbers 3 and 4 are seen in a most derogatory light by the general public and indeed in the technical literature as well. For instance Cindy Pan states, “While some have mistakenly viewed SIB (Self-injurious behaviour) as a “call for help” or a type of attention seeking behaviour, it is generally a highly secret activity, with self injurers usually going to extensive lengths to conceal and wounds”.

Why has she used the word ‘mistakenly’, what’s wrong with self harming to get attention?

Number 1 cuts self to release tension and number 4 cuts self to get attention. Both engage in self harm for a clear psychological gain, the first to release tension and the second to get attention. What’s the difference?

There is a belief out there, sometimes stated and sometimes not that when a person does attention seeking behaviour then they are considered pathetic, amoral, inferior or words to that effect. One is viewed in quite a poor light. This is for self harmers and otherwise.

Of course the support groups for self harmers have been quite vigourous in downplaying those who self harm to manipulate or seek attention. Understandably so, as they are wanting the public to view self harmers in a better light not a worse light. Some groups try to deny that there is any who self harm for attention seeking or grossly play down the numbers. Dr Cindy Pan seems to be doing the same. In some ways it has now become sort of politically incorrect to say that a person cuts self so as to get attention.

It took me five minutes to find this on the internet. There are thousands and thousands who are willing to put their self harming and their faces onto the internet for the whole world to see. Yes some do self harm very privately and there are others who are public about it. Obviously different motives are in play.

Whilst all this is good and well there is just one problem. There are people who do self harm to get attention and to manipulate others into certain actions. For instance the woman who cuts self because she knows that will get her placed in hospital for a couple of days. Or the person who self harms because they know that their suicidal statements will then be taken more seriously. What about these people? Not only do the general public look down on them but the self harm support groups deny that they even exist!

So these people:

3. Cutting self to manipulate others
4. Cutting self to get attention

have become the lepers of the leper colonies. They are at the bottom of the bottom of the pile.

One consequence of this shows up in Cindy Pan’s article. At the end she writes about what can be done to help self harmers. The focus is very much on those who self harm for reasons such as tension release or to get a sense of ‘realness’. There is little or none written on what you do for those who self harm to manipulate others. Why would one write about them when they have just stated that they kind of don’t really exist anyway.

In this way what she has written is representative of the clinical literature as well. There is very little written on what treatment one uses for those who self harm to manipulate others or to get attention. Again, how can there be as it is seen as politically incorrect to make such an assertion in the first place!

One treatment strategy that I have used with such people is working with their stroke filters in conjunction with an adaptation of the no-suicide contract which in essence is a no-self harm contract.

[Link: Graffiti]

Living On Their Edge

“I really want it all to just be over…all the torture and pain I feel right now I want to just leave behind and never think about again. But I can’t, I’m trapped inside myself and I’ve got no choice but to endure…to cry alone every night with no other shoulder to lean on and nobody to wipe away my tears. I’m screaming inside with the fear that I won’t make it through tomorrow…*SLASH* *SLASH*…ohhhhh. Physical pain over this emotional torture any day of the week for me. In a way I almost feel like Jesus watching myself bleed, the wounds and sorrow I’ve built up streaming down my arms and legs. I feel ALIVE…confirmed! ..........

..........For some reason, society is shocked and often disgusted when presented to an individual with these extreme feelings of shame, low self-worth, and anxiety. The response that follows this shock is a desire to quickly categorize and socially compartmentalize the individual. In order to avoid dealing with the issue of self-injury in our society, we have made attempts to justify the issue by citing probability and genetics as root causes of the problem. In a sample of billions of people, there are bound to be a few screw-ups right? Unfortunately this ridiculous attempt at rationalization is extremely impersonal and ends up creating a shroud of disgust and shame that suffocates the issue of self-injury in our society. "

So begins an 8 page essay available here [pdf]

written by Jimmy

Let me know what you think of it, it is long but I definitely thought it worth the read ...

What self-injurers say SI does for them

Many papers on self-harm, have uncovered possible motivations for self-injurious behavior:

• Escape from emptiness, depression, and feelings of unreality.
• Easing tension.
• Providing relief: when intense feelings build, self-injurers are overwhelmed and unable to cope. By causing pain, they reduce the level of emotional and physiological arousal to a bearable one.
• Relieving anger: many self-injurers have enormous amounts of rage within. Afraid to express it outwardly, they injure themselves as a way of venting these feelings.
• Escaping numbness: many of those who self-injure say they do it in order to feel something, to know that they're still alive.
• Grounding in reality, as a way of dealing with feelings of depersonalization and dissociation
• Maintaining a sense of security or feeling of uniqueness
• Obtaining a feeling of euphoria
• Preventing suicide
• Expressing emotional pain they feel they cannot bear
• Obtaining or maintaining influence over the behavior of others
• Communicating to others the extent of their inner turmoil
• Communicating a need for support
• Expressing or repressing sexuality
• Expressing or coping with feelings of alienation
• Validating their emotional pain -- the wounds can serve as evidence that those feelings are real
• Continuing abusive patterns: self-injurers tend to have been abused as children.
• Punishing oneself for being "bad"
• Obtaining biochemical relief: there is some thought that adults who were repeatedly traumatized as children have a hard time returning to a "normal" baseline level of arousal and are, in some sense, addicted to crisis behavior. Self-harm can perpetuate this kind of crisis state.
• Diverting attention (inner or outer) from issues that are too painful to examine
• Exerting a sense of control over one's body
• Preventing something worse from happening

[taken in part from 'Suicide & Mental Health Association International']

Friday Readers Story

Anonymous said...

I am 19 years old, and I've been cutting myself since I was 15. My boyfriend at the time committed suicide, which I think I read someone else on here has been through, and it is really hard. I was there, when he did it, so I never really got over it. I tried to kill myself twice before my next birthday. I have his name cut into my arm. I met and got into a relationship with another guy, that ended up being an abusive relationship.

That went on for..almost two years. I came out of that with a daughter (born at 25 wks), and several more scars.I recently attempted suicide again and was diagnosed as bipolar, as well as suffering from PTSD, which I now have medication for. I think the reason I do it, (I still do it) is because when I do it, and I bleed, it just..I don't know..gives me a physical reason for the pain, which kind of helps..

But, I am trying, /trying/ to work past it, so I can be there for my kids, and my soon to be husband.I don't know why I felt like I needed to go into that here, but I did..so..I dunno, maybe it'll help someone.
January 19, 2008

Who Is Likely To Engage In Self-injurious Behavior?

Both males and females engage in self-injurious behavior. Self-harm often begins in early adolescence, peaks between the ages of 18 and 24, and decreases as the person enters the 30s and 40s. There are, however, cases of self-harm occurring in much younger children and continuing into middle age.

Adolescents are particularly vulnerable as they face many difficult and inherently stressful developmental challenges. The body undergoes profound change during adolescence. It is a time of physiological and psychological turbulence and uncertainty. Faced with abrupt and embarrassing changes, teens can feel a loss of control of their bodies. For many adolescents, experiencing a sense of alienation from their own bodies becomes a powerful catalyst for and predictor of self-injurious behavior. In addition, teenagers struggle with the need for peer acceptance, shifting peer allegiances, a greater desire for autonomy and control and complicated decisions and conflicts that demand resolution.

Within this overwhelming context, adolescents are at even greater risk when their parents are physically or emotionally unavailable to them. In some families, there may be unhealthy communication, parental alcoholism, untreated mental illness, financial stress, domestic violence and parental neglect or pro-longed absences. Teens are unable to negotiate these challenges, process their feelings and articulate their needs without the guidance, support and feedback of a nurturing caretaker. They simply do not have the required coping skills to manage on their own, and they discover that self-injurious behavior is one way to deal with life.

Teenagers who have undiagnosed and untreated depression and anxiety are more likely to engage in self-harming behaviors as a way to self-soothe and self-medicate. Teens who struggle with low self-esteem and feelings of worthlessness are equally at risk. Adolescents with dissociative disorders, posttraumatic stress disorder, substance abuse problems and eating disorders are at increased risk to cut or burn. One of the greatest risk factors is a history of physical, emotional or sexual abuse. Trauma survivors learn to internalize their rage and dissociate or "check out" to escape pain. In addition, they have had their perpetrators model a blatant disregard for the safety and well being of their bodies. This combination of experiences almost inevitably sets the stage for some form of self-destructive behavior.

Taken from *PRP Online

*Performance Resource Press

Fridays Readers Story

Ben said...
To be 100% honest, my reason for beginning to burn (which progressed to cutting) wasn't what I've read about on most "help" sites. The reason I started was because I wanted to actually feel pain for the first time and be able to control it. It doesn't bring out a sense of enjoyment like the average family man would have while spending time with his family, but it makes me feel good as I do it and after I do it.

I don't want to sound like someone who is overly compulsive about hurting themselves because that is not the case. I started about a month ago and I think about doing it everyday with two knives and a set of matches sitting on my desk. I'm not sure if I want to stop because I'm not sure if it is a huge problem or not, but I do feel differently about my self-esteem since I started.

The more I burn the more I feel that I am isolating myself. I planned on trying to start a relationship with someone that I know but as i started my self-image shot so far into the toilet that I basically pushed her away and then felt lonely and at a total loss of confidence that she isn't talking to me much anymore. Again, to be completely honest, I'm not even sure why I'm leaving a comment on this site that I found within the last 5 minutes.

Well to get to the point, I'm not sure if I should stop or not because it does 2 things for me: 1. it makes me feel fearless (to a lesser extent) and 2. it is (i think) making me isolate myself from everyone around me. Diagnosed as clinically depressed over a year ago, I have even failed to show, or even talk to my shrink about these things. I'm unsure if what I'm feeling is something that everyone goes through and although my issues don't seem as hard to deal with as some others who has had the courage to share but I do feel it is worth either seeking help for or being told that my reason for burning/cutting is sufficient and that this phase will end soon enough.

There is more to my story if you are interested because I would love to talk to someone who is interested in an unconcerned (parent-like) way.

My email is bensjamin_@hotmail.com
November 30, 2007

Image:Alone by ~bluedicius

Friday Reader's Story

Instead of Fridays Reader's story I have posted Lynse story from her blog, she hopes others relate.

To most the thought of harming yourself would be so outlandish that you would look at me like I was crazy if I told you that it makes sense to me.

I am choosing to write about this because there is such a need around this generation to bring light and truth to the fact that a lot of this generation is stuck in the rut of Self Injury. It is a painful place to be and takes a lot to get past. It is a dark place to get stuck. And as statistics are showing there are a lot of people stuck there.

So I want to share my story……

I started “cutting” when I was 13. I don't fully remember how I was introduced to it, but within a few days had taken root in my life. The pain that was so deep inside of me was killing me. I was allowing myself to die emotionally. It was a fight that I didn't want to take place but had no idea of how to stop it. It seemed meaningless to fight to keep them alive when i viewed them as the things that were causing me so much pain.

So my only solution to make sure that I was not dying totally was to hurt myself. To feel the pain on the outside assured me that i was still alive. That there was still hope. At least that it how it all started. It started out of my desire for hope. For some feeling to let me know that I was alive. That I could still feel something. That one day maybe I would feel again.

Soon it became an addiction. I had my way of doing it. I had my “ritual.” The when and how. within 2 months it had moved past the need for hope. My body and mind were addicted to the feeling. To the release that it gave me. My rage towards myself and other people had grown so much that I didnt know how to release it. And I thought this was a good way.

As time went on whether I had a bad day or not I had to cut. I had to do it each night before I went to bed. It calmed me enough to rest and go to sleep. (and about addiction, still to this day if I experience intense pain I get tired because my mind was trained to go to sleep after pain.)

I share this because I know that there are people who are in this rut. And honestly, it breaks my heart. Because being on the other side of this “journey” for hope I have found that the only hope that there is is in Christ. I know, i sound super spiritual….but it is true.

The only way that i could figure that out was to get to the darkest part of my life. I was in such darkness. I had been cutting for 4 years and no one knew. I had a secret. And it was a dark dark place to be in, full of pain and the desire to get caught in hope that someone could help me. I was tired of the darkness. And the only solution i knew was to come clean. To get someone in my head and share the journey with.

This was key for me. To let someone in and know the pains and the hurts. I knew that if I let this remain in the darkness it would grow bigger and bigger and the thing that once started in the search for hope was driving me further and further away from it.

The person I went to had no idea what to say. She often looked at me dumbfounded. the thought of doing that to herself was so absurd that she couldnt understand, but she listened. She was determined to help me in any ways she could, even though she didnt understand.

You cant wait until you understand to help someone. And this is what I see happening. So many people know people who self injure and are trying to learn why they do it. Each person has their story. And if you ask, I am sure they will share. It is a very dangerous thing to get into. You may not realize the roots that it can create in your life. But I would encourage you to share your story with someone.

But without sounding like a public service announcement, if you self injure or know someone who does please please please let someone in. Let someone into your darkness. It will hurt at first. It will be uncomfortable. It will be embarrassing. But if you live in the darkness alone your life will never change. Let someone in and bring the light into your pain.

Find your hope.

This is a post by Lynes and she has given permission for others to post it, to raise awareness and promote understanding of self harm. I personally thank her for sharing her story and the compassion she shows for others healin.... Abz

*In no way does Random endorse Christianity or any other form of religion

Quote

"We must understand that in the trauma survivor, self injury is functional. It always performs some deep, underlying function. Most generally, it’s an attempt to ward off worse harm."

– David Calof